Christmas 2007

Make an on-line slideshow at www.OneTrueMedia.com

Can we say complicated?

Boy oh boy.

I had a conference call with the folks from Gladney yesterday about the possibility about adopting while living abroad. I knew it could be done and I knew it would be more expensive. Additional fees include $1,000 flat rate for adoption from overseas plus any additional unknown expense to have the home study done there and additional fees associated with shipping things back and forth overseas. All that sounds feasible. I mean, heck, you're already spending an obscene amount of money in the first place what's another two or three grand? That I can do. What is much more complicated is the process of finding a home study agency and making sure it is approved by the US embassy in the foreign country, figuring out how to file the I600A, going through a legal adoption in a foreign court, applying for a visa for my child to enter the US while residing in a foreign country and a whole host of other unknown complications bound to arise from not knowing the language. I stress easily and this is stressing me out and I haven't even started the process yet! And, not to mention, this would no doubt take more than a year so I need to be prepared to live in that country for at least two years. I better like my new job and city.

The great idea that I had of starting the process now and then moving overseas for a year was rejected. Can't do that I was told.... Obviously the easiest way would be to either do it now from the States and reside here the year after the adoption (for the post placement visits) or wait until I return from overseas to begin the process. The hard way is to do it while living abroad.

Doing it now means I would be spending next Christmas with my beautiful baby girl but it means that I have to postpone my dream of living abroad for several years. It also means being in this area for another couple of years and most likely in the same job.

Doing it later means I can live abroad as a single woman--eat out, enjoy the nightlife, travel extensively on weekends and holidays, maybe learn a language, date and maybe meet Mr. Right-- basically get the desire to live abroad out of my system, and accomplish some more personal goals with my free time. It also means, though, that I run the risk of losing the opportunity to adopt an infant (by exceeding the number of years between me and my child per Ethiopian law) or not being able to adopt from there at all (if singles are banned).

And what would I do if that were to happen? I guess I would adopt an older child and/or pursue domestic adoption?

Doing it from abroad means I can do all of the above (travel, accomplish some personal goals, and still adopt an infant) but it's much, much more complicated and more expensive.

Boy oh boy. What am I going to do?! :-/

Hepatitis A risk

While doing some research I came across this information.
FYI

Adopting while abroad

US Citizens Adopting While Living Abroad

Domestic Adoption

Adoptive parents will have to comply with laws in two countries to complete an intercountry adoption while living abroad: the United States and the country in which you live. You will need to research the immigration laws and rules regarding the granting of visas to US citizens and their children.

The adoption will be processed in the State in which you claim legal residence: where you are registered to vote, or the State that issues your driver's license. You will be required to locate a social worker or agency in your home country to perform your homestudy, although the placement may be handled by a US agency. Your State Adoption Specialist will need to verify that the homestudy is accepted for a placement in your State.

You may be required to file your I-600A or I-600 adoption applications with the US Immigration and Naturalization Service by mail, at the regional office for your home State, or at a local US Embassy.

Intercountry Adoption

Adoptive parents will have to comply with laws in three countries to complete an intercountry adoption while living abroad. You should follow the above information, but investigate procedures in the US, in your home country, and in the country from which you are seeking to adopt.

For more information about adoption procedures, see our Introduction to Adoption. You may search the National Adoption Directory to locate contact information for State Adoption Specialists or adoption agencies in your State.

A helpful tool in pursuing any intercountry adoption is the Report on Intercountry Adoption, published by International Concerns for Children, Inc. It costs $25 when mailed to US addresses, and the cost includes 10 updates per year. It will save you hours of research and phone calls, because it lists US agencies willing to work with expatriate Americans, and US agencies working in a specific foreign country. The Report allows you to compare agencies in the following areas:

Age and type of children available
Estimated time for referral of a child
Estimated time until travel to the foreign country to complete the adoption
Fees charged
Any programmatic restrictions that might exclude you from participation (required length of marriage, marital status, religious affiliation, etc).

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Adoptive Parents Residing in Ethiopia: Adoptive parents residing in Ethiopia face a few issues not faced by those living in the United States.

There is a sole social worker who is authorized to conduct a home study for the purposes of satisfying the requirements of USCIS’ I-600A application and I-600 petition processes. To request a home study, prospective adoptive parents resident in Ethiopia may contact social worker Malahat BAIG-AMIN at 251 11 371 3307/3334 or cell phone number 251 91 131 5299. Prospective adoptive parents may also contact an accredited American agency to see if/when the agency may be sending a social worker to Ethiopia. The social worker can conduct a home study, but it takes a few months after the social worker returns to the United States before the home study is finalized and received by the adoptive parents in Ethiopia.

I-600A applications are sent to the Officer-in-Charge, U.S. Department of Homeland Security, United Nations Avenue, Gigiri, Nairobi. The embassy telephone number from Ethiopia is (00254-20) 363-6500. Before the I-600A is sent, it should be brought in to the Consular Section along with the filing fee to obtain a fee receipt. DHS Nairobi will act on the application as quickly as possible, but may take a month or more to respond. Prospective adoptive parents can contact DHS Nairobi directly via fax 00254 20 363 6103.



ADOPTION FEES IN ETHIOPIA: Before the Adoption: Adoptive parents can expect to pay fees for authentication of U.S. documents for use abroad and for translation fees. All English-language documents submitted to the Ethiopian court must be accompanied by a translation in Amharic. The U.S. Embassy understands that translation services run about $1 per page, but check with your adoption agency for up to date information on translation costs.

MOWA and the police charge no fees for services creating dossiers on the parents and the child, investigating whether the child is a bona fide orphan, meeting in committee to review the case, and making their recommendations to the court.

Courts charge no fees for services in accepting adoption petitions, making judgments, and issuing decrees.

MOWA often asks for a letter from the U.S. Embassy supporting the parents' desire to adopt. If the Embassy has received the petition approval from USCIS, a letter can be issued supporting the adoption. This service is free.

If additional documents are required by MOWA, the agency/parents can submit certified copies. Cost for certification by the U.S. Embassy is $30 per grommeted package, or single document.

After the adoption: The services of MOWA in issuing a letter to the U.S. Embassy attesting to the orphan status of the child, and issuing requests so that the child's new birth certificate and passport can be issued, are free.

The issuance of a local birth certificate costs about $2; for expeditious or same day service, add about $5.

To have a birth certificate or other document authenticated at the Ministry of Foreign Affairs it costs about $16 for Ethiopian parents, about $35 for foreign parents.

Ethiopian Passport issuance is about $35.

Orphanages run by religious organizations, and the large government run orphanages, charge nothing for their services to prepare and sign adoption contracts.

The Department does not know what the licensed adoption agencies charge to process an Ethiopian adoption. Local unscrupulous adoption facilitators have been known to charge adoptive parents additional costs beyond what prospective adoptive parents believed they would be charged, often after they have arrived in Ethiopia and already have their children in their physical custody. Some of these parents indicated to the U.S. Embassy that the costs ran thousands of dollars more than they expected to pay.



ADOPTION PROCEDURES: MOWA identifies orphans in need of a permanent family placement through international adoption. In general, Ethiopian orphans identified for intercountry adoption have been abandoned by their parents or have lost their parents to disease or other misfortune. MOWA places abandoned or orphaned children in orphanages or foster homes, pending adoption. When a child is abandoned, by law it comes into the custody of the government. When a child is found to have two HIV/AIDS-infected parents, or one living HIV/AIDS-infected parent, the government routinely declares that the child is an orphan and assumes legal guardianship of the child. Many AIDS-orphaned children adopted by Americans come from the HIV/AIDS hospice run by the Missionaries of Charity in Addis Ababa.

Please be aware that it is common practice for the Government of Ethiopia to require that a child be resident in an orphanage for three months before they can be adopted.

MOWA has responsibility for all activities regarding children in the country, including welfare, foster care, domestic and intercountry adoption, and investigation of neglect and abuse. When an orphaned or abandoned child comes into the custody of the government, the police and MOWA create the child's dossier.

Note - An adoption agency’s U.S. and Ethiopian-based staff manages the adoption process in Ethiopia. American citizens who are adopting privately must complete all of these steps unaided by adoption professionals.

Step One - Prospective adoptive parents must take or send all of the required documents (see document list below), already certified and authenticated, to the Ethiopian Embassy in Washington, D.C. for additional authentication. Once the Embassy has completed its authentication, the completed packet is returned to the adoptive parents. Then the prospective adoptive parents forward the documents to:

Ministry Of Women’s Affairs (MOWA)
Children and Youth Affairs Office, Adoption Team (CYAO)
P.O. Box 1293
Addis Ababa
Ethiopia

MOWA reviews the documents for completeness and creates a dossier on the adoptive parent(s).

Nov. 30

November 30th could not come soon enough! This blogging every day was a lot more difficult than I thought it would be. On the other hand, the kick in the pants to be productive daily was really good for me. I didn't realize how much time I actually waste and I am going to be a lot more efficient with my time. It was good to get a lot of things done around my house finally!

Today I tracked down my dryer. They will deliver it on Tuesday.
~30 min.

Wrote an international school about a position they have listed on their website for January. They responded and said it was really for August :(
But now they have heard of me so maybe they will interview me for then
... if I am still available. ;-)
~45 min.

Oops! Coming up short on the last day of the month? That's not good.
Oh well. There's always tomorrow!


Hope you had a productive month people!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Ciao.

Nov. 29

So, as I was driving to work this morning I got a phone call. It was Home Depot Expo with my dryer. They said they'd be at my house in 15 minutes. I was like, uh, no, I am not going to be home until 1:00 and someone was supposed to call me the day before so I could set up a 4 hour window that worked for both of us He said he'd speak to his supervisor and call me back. Well, he didn't and when I called back I got no answer. So, I don't know where my dryer is nor when it is bring delivered!! Grrrrrr. Can I tell you how tempted I was to turn around and blow off a day of work?! I am patting myself on the back for my continued display of much needed maturity for not doing that. :)

I researched more international schools. I am going to write a couple of them this week and inquire about openings for the winter/spring. Why not? I have no man here, I don't particularly like my job and I prefer to adopt when I am working somewhere I think I will stay a while or when I have more money--both of which I could have after this international experience. I'll keep you posted.
~2hours

Pottery class.
~2.5 hours


Hope you had a productive day. See you tomorrow--the last day of Productivity Month!

Nov. 28

Uh oh. I don't think I did anything productive today. I had to work late today, well late for me: until 4:30 and then my sister was in town for business so I met her for a drink. We had a really good conversation and she convinced me to join her and her colleague for dinner at I Ricci. The food was very good and since yesterday I decided I need to live in the moment, I decided to join them instead of coming home to put up Xmas decorations, do laundry and straighten up. If that counts as being productive, then...
~2 hours


If not, well, I am at a loss. What did I do?? Oh, I emailed the head of the overseas job fair and told him I am interested in attending a job fair. You have to be invited to them. Did I mention that? Yeah, not only do I have to get an offer to go overseas but I have to be invited to the job fair in order to interview for said job. I did what I could which was fill out the application and contact them to let them know I am interested in attending a job fair and now all I can do is wait and see.
~30 min.

And that's all I did.

Hope you had a productive day. See you tomorrow.

Nov. 27

**** Scary anecdote added below****

1. Went to the bank and deposited checks that have been laying around my house for months.
~1 hour

2. Laundry. Again. I think I need to tell myself that one day of the week is laundry day and not do any laundry on any other day. Tired of it! Although I suppose that means I would spend the whole day doing it and that wouldn't be fun.
~30 min.


I had big plans to do all sorts of things today but all I did was sit in front of the computer for hours looking at international schools and adoption blogs--my two current obsessions/time wasters. :( I need to start living in the moment. I know that teaching abroad or parenting will help a lot with that because both of those experiences will be so rich and life-changing. If only I had something beautiful and positive in my life right now that helped me live in the moment and enjoy the journey instead of always being so focused on what's to come. Alas, my eyes are burning from the past X hours staring at the computer screen so I am going to sign off.

** I wanted to put this incident in my blog since I am still feeling nervous and freaked out...

I had planned to rake my leaves today but a man approached me as I was walking into my house and asked if he could do it for me. I agreed to let him do it for $5.00 since I like to help out my people when I can and he seemed harmless and in need. So I gave him the lawn bags and paid him in advance. He was surprised and made some joke about how he could take off running down the street, but I said jokingly, "My neighbor [who was on the porch] will keep an eye on you." Mind you, the man on the porch I had never seen before, but the raker didn't know that. Anyway, I mention this whole event because it made me a little uncomfortable when he rang my doorbell when he was done. I was on the phone so I was able to keep it short without appearing too rude, but when I answered the door he had a piece of my mail which he handed to me. I asked him where he had gotten it (as my mail had already been delivered that day) and he said my neighbor had it. Then he proceeded to pull out a pen and paper and started to write down my name--now knowing from the mail, my first and last name-- and ask me for my phone number so he'd be able to reach me the next time he was in the neighborhood to rake leaves. This struck me as very odd as he said he lived just 3 blocks north of me. What random leaf raker, snow shoveler, etc. asks the person who hired them for their number?! I said, "No, why not just give yours and I can contact you if I need your services again" but he balked. Not that I would ever call him, but if is so hard pressed for $5 you would think he might want to have the option of making more money, especially considering he was about 44 and in need of some dental work. I am not trying to be mean here. Let me explain. I feel very weirded out by this encounter and I wanted to put as much detail in here that I could... you know why. Needless to say, I set the alarm immediately, but I don't know how well I will be sleeping tonight. At least the man on the porch next door (whoever he was) got a good look at him and my home phone number is unlisted.


Hope you had a productive day. See you tomorrow.

Nov. 26

1. Final measure for blind for the upstairs windows. I don't know if I am going to order those, though. It's getting a little steep!!
~45 min.


2. Laundry (can't wait for my dryer!!) and bills. bo-ring
~45 min.


3. Researched more international schools. I also spoke to a friend of mine whose first choice is Hong Kong. She found a school that pays $75,000 tax free and gives a bonus at the end of a 2 year contract of close to $20,000! Dang, I could return to the states with $$$$$$$$. I could pay for the adoption without batting an eye and still have money left over. And I just realized if I am planning on staying there for 2 years anyway, I could start the adoption process right away and surely it would be done within that two year time frame. But I don't know if I can live in Hong Kong for two years! That's a lo-o-o-o-ong time. I could see living in Dakar for that long though cause I could spend weekends at the beach and learn French fluently. If in Ethiopia I could learn Amharic and anywhere in Africa I could do some humanitarian work on the weekends... but I wouldn't be making anywhere near that kind of money. The more I think about it though, the more sense it all seems to make.
~2 hours


Hope you had a productive day. See you tomorrow.

Nov. 25

I woke up this morning feeling like I hadn't slept yet. Weird. But I made it to church. I swear, it feels like it's been 10,000 million years since I've been. Great sermon about art and spirituality.
~1 hour

But after church I was so-o-o-o-o tired and couldn't bring myself to do anything!! :( And I had a head ache that I couldn't shake. (Maybe it's the potpourri?) Though I had big plans to get things done, all I could do was lie on the couch. Then I took a 2 hour nap. Woke up in time to see the Amazing Race though. :) I love that show!


Hope you had a more productive day. See you tomorrow.

Nov. 24

I had very little sleep last night. In bed last night I came up with another idea to make some money and I got so excited I couldn't fall asleep. Then I woke up early after dreaming that it was successful! I can't wait to get my office/studio together this weekend so I can get stared creating!

Meanwhile, Thanksgiving vacation is almost over. Bummer! I am so enjoying myself. Today I...

1. Went to Aaron Brothers and Micheal's to buy frames and mattes. While I was there I also found these lovely stocking hangers. They are silver and there is a space to add a photo. I fell in love with the star one and can't wait to hang them on my mantle. I bought two! I think I will decorate for Xmas tonight! I started by putting out my holiday potpourri. It smells so good!
~ 2 hours


2. Spoke to the guy at Home Depot Expo about my window treatments.
~1 hour


3. Researched more overseas schools. I have been thinking more and more about this option. I know it's risky to take a job overseas job for a year or two when the Ethiopian government may decide to change their rules about who may adopt their children, but then I remind myself that the child who is meant to be for me is for me. If it becomes that she is not from Ethiopia but from Haiti or Ghana or Vietnam Liberia or America, than that is the child I am meant to raise. Really all I can do is continue to look at my options and see which one presents itself to me. My fundraising idea may make me enough money to just travel this spring, giving me the opportunity to return and resume my Ethiopian adoption. Or I may attend the job fair and not get any offers. Or I may get a dream job here. There are so many ways that this could play out. I am doing what I can to look at all the angles and when the opportunities present themselves I will decide at that point which one is best for me.
~2 hours

Hope you had a productive day. See you tomorrow.

Nov. 23

I hope you had a wonderful Thanksgiving holiday with family or friends, ate a delicious meal and gave thanks for your blessings.

...And now it's Black Friday. Everyone in America, it seems, is out shopping on the biggest shopping day of the year. I know this year I personally will be buying very few gifts that aren't helping someone - somewhere - somehow. Is my purchase paying someone a living wage? Is the organization donating most of all of the profits for a worthy cause? In order to accomplish this I will need to shop at places like Heifer International or Unicef or WorldVision or Ten Thousand Villages and the like. You know to be honest, though, I know even as recent as a couple of years ago, I may have been a little disappointed in a gift of a goat donation in my name. And I'm ashamed to admit that. (remember that episode of Seinfeld when George gave gifts to his co-workers in their name to the Human Fund?) But now that I am more educated and sensitive and empathetic and disheartened and enraged about extreme, abject poverty and suffering around the world it makes commercialism that much more disconcerting.

After writing that I feel a little bit of a hypocrite writing that I spent money today on home upgrades. I realize I am fortunate to be able to afford a home and make it comfortable and I suppose as long as I also share my good fortune and time and knowledge with those in need, it's OK. I don't know. What do you think?

Here's what I did today:

1. Tried to place the order for the plantation shutters but the information wasn't in the system so they wouldn't allow me to pay for them. In a way it was good though because it allows me a couple more days to decide which rooms I want to order them for. I left the blinds section and went over to appliances and bought a new dryer. I am so excited! I have been without a dryer for months. I looked on line at Consumer Reports before I left and knew the exact model I wanted. They ordered it for me and even met the price I had found on the internet!
~2 hours


2. I went to Ikea and got some more things for the house. So much stuff was on sale! I got a lot there for very little.
~2 hours


3. Laundry, as usual. But soon I will have a dryer and it will go so much faster!
~30 min.


4. Finally I went to a hardware store and got some fishing wire (to hang my $3.00 star ornaments I got from Ikea from the chandelier), some plastic to cover the windows to keep the cold out and some nice holiday scented potpourri.
~ 45 min.


Woo-hoo! Can we say pro-duc-tive!?


Hope you had a productive day. See you tomorrow.

Nov. 22-Happy Thanksgiving!

Happy Thanksgiving everyone! I spent it all alone and enjoyed every minute of it. :-) Since Home Depot was closed, I couldn't order my shutters or buy a dryer. Must do that tomorrow! So, what did I do instead you ask? I cooked a huge meal! I don't know what I came over me. I even looked at recipes! (I don't know who that was in my kitchen but she sure whipped up a delicious meal! LOL) So I made garlicky green beans with almonds, cranberry/apricot sauce and potatoes with garlic, onions, shallots and rosemary. And I bought a precooked chicken and gravy to round out the meal. Not a typical Thanksgiving meal for my family at all, but this wasn't a typical Thanksgiving.


I found the recipes for the cranberry/apricot sauce and green beans in November issue of Real Simple and I modified them. Below are my modified versions:

Garlicky Green Beans with Almonds

1 lb. green beans
2 T olive oil
3 large cloves of garlic, thinly sliced
1/3 c. slivered almonds

Bring pot of lightly salted water to boil. Cook beans for 3 minutes or until tender. Meanwhile, heat the oil in a large skillet over medium heat. Add garlic and cook, stirring, for 1 minute. Add nuts and cook til golden brown, about 3 minutes. Drain beans and add to pan. Toss to coat. Add salt and pepper to taste.

starting the beans

just a few more left
chopping garlic


see??! it's really me in there!



Cranberry/Apricot Sauce

1 T Earth Balance
2 T minced ginger from a jar
16 oz. frozen cranberries
2/3 c. Sucanat
1/2 c. fresh squeezed lemon juice
1/2 c. apricot preserves

Over medium heat, melt the butter. Add ginger and cook, stirring for 2 minutes. Add cranberries, Sucanat, lemon juice and preserves. Cook, stirring occasionally until sauce thickens, about 20 min. You can serve this warm or cold.

I use this instead of sugar all the time



starting the cranberry/apricot sauce
Mmmmm...the finished product.

The potato recipe is a modified version of the one found in the November issue of O Magazine. It called for russet potatoes but I had Yukon gold ones. I had bought those cause I was going to make buttermilk mashed potatoes but then I decided to do something healthier. Here's what I made:

Roasted Rosemary Potatoes with Garlic and Shallots

4-5 Yukon gold potatoes, cut into 1-2" inch pieces
1/2 large red onion, chopped
6 medium shallots, peeled
2 T. fresh rosemary, chopped fine
1/3 c. olive oil
6 large garlic cloves, chopped

Preheat oven to 425 degrees. Combine all but garlic in a mixing bowl and toss. Put is pan large enough to have only one layer of potatoes. Bake 30 min. Remove pan from oven and add garlic. Stir and return to oven for 30 more minutes.


a little overdone but nice and hot!



the dry ass chicken that had to be doctored up

Et voila' ! My dinner!Not bad! And I will have leftovers for days! Come over and have some! :)
~ 3 hours

I also spent part of the day reflecting about what I am thankful for. Here are ten things that came to mind:

1. my family~i had a great childhood and my parents are still here to offer their support
2. my friends~some to hang out with, some to talk to, some to learn from...
3. my virtual blogging buddies~my biggest supporters on this journey!!
4. my house~ constantly changing and finally becoming my own
5. my job~not stressful, the kids make me laugh every day and it pays the bills
6. my relationship with God~ there when I need Him most
7. my health~had a successful surgery this year and am basically in good health overall
8. living in a (basically) safe country
9. many opportunities and choices about which direction my life can go
10. beauty all around~ nature, music, photography, cooking, pottery, scrapbooking, drawing, painting, etc!

~ 30 min.

Hope you had a productive day &/or a Happy Thanksgiving!!!!
See you tomorrow.

Nov. 21

The painters came and finished up the cabinets and rehung all the doors. He said it would take 2 days to fully dry so I can't close the doors just yet. Not sure if I am sold on them but it does make the whole place look brighter.

Met with the plantation shutters guy this morning who was here to measure my windows. I'm going to order them for the living room, dining room and kitchen windows. Still undecided about the other rooms, but I'm going to get those three for sure. He said if I order before Nov. 25 I get 15% off and they will be installed by Xmas! Wow, can't beat that! I am so excited.
~ 1.5 hours


Made a decision about my life!!!!!!!!!
~months and months of agonzing...

And the decision is... I am not going to do an IUI. If married I would probably try, but I don't want to be pregnant enough to go through with anonymous sperm donation. It's a difficult and unusual predicament to not be infertile but to still more the loss of a biological child. All I can say is that if it is God's will for me to be blessed with a husband, I will be. I can only control so much and ultimately I trust that the family I am meant to have will be joy of my life. I had always imagined that I would have the husband and several children, both biological and adopted, and God willing that will still be the way. But, if not, I trust that whatever blessings are bestowed upon me will be make me happy beyond measure. If it's just me and my little girl, we will be happy!

That decision takes one pressure off my mind. Not needing to stay here to do IUI cycles frees me up to do some other things this Spring--like quit my job and do some international volunteering. If I had more money I would just do it. But paying for an international adoption and a 3-6 month stint in Africa and my mortgage simultaneously--without an income-- is just not feasible. I mean, we're talking like $40,000. So I haven't quite figured out what I am going to do, but I am going, somehow. At some point in your life you have a mid-life crisis reflect on your accomplishments and what you have done to give back in the world to show thanks for your blessings. Let's just say I am not impressed. Sure I've taught hundreds of children and traveled and bought property - blah, blah, blah- but I could have done so much more. Living abroad will give me the opportunity to do just that. If I go in the Spring I can continue with the adoption process but I'll be broke. If I wait until the Summer, and go with an overseas job offer (assuming I get one), I will have an income but I will most likely have to put the adoption on hold and who knows if Americans will still be able to adopt from Ethiopia when I am ready. I need to email Natalie at Gladney again and find out exactly how difficult and how much more expensive it is to adopt while living abroad. Dang! Even though I ruled out IUIs, nothing seems any more settled than before! It seems even with one thing eliminated, things actually got more complicated! How is that possible?!


Hope you had a productive day. See you tomorrow.

Nov. 20

Hmmm.... I'm on vacation mode already... no work until Monday. I'm hard pressed to think of anything productive I did today. Does having a date with my future husband count? He doesn't know this is his future yet, but I can see it..................

ANYHOO~ I researched volunteer vacations.
~1 hour

And that's all; I'm not even going to lie...

Hope you had a productive day. See you tomorrow.

Nov. 19

Wanna help me make a decision? (LOL) ----------------------------- >

Today was pajama day in my classroom. The kids wore their pajamas to school (and so did teachers!) They were soooooo cute!!! I kept thinking how cute it really must be to see your kid in her pj's after her bath all scrubbed clean and smelling good. The more I think about it my future daughter, the more I think my idea of quitting and traveling makes the most sense. Here's how it would work: I'd quit my job but tell them I want to return in the fall but that I really feel the need to go to Africa for a while to live. They may tell me 'no way we'd hire you back' or maybe they'd be desperate understand and rehire me in the fall. I could live/travel anywhere from January to May and then return to look for a job (if necessary) and get settled back into life here. If I resume the adoption process before I go, I could get the home study and most of the paperwork done before I left. Maybe I could do the fingerprinting and some other things from whatever country I am in. Then my kiddo would arrive in the winter of next year. The only reasons I am hesitating are:
1. Will I be able to enjoy myself abroad if I am unemployed and expecting a child? and
2. Where will I go and what will I do?
I emailed my friend in Senegal and asked if she would mind me hanging out there for a while--and she said it was fine--but again, what would I do there? I know I would want to spend some time in Ethiopia as well. Volunteering in an orphanage is one thought, but where would I stay while in that country? I have no hook ups there. I may look into a volunteer program but I looked into some last year and they cost thousands and I'd still have to pay my mortgage back here without an income coming in (and while paying for an adoption). Another thought I have is to email some of the schools I considered teaching in and see if they have a long term sub position. Then I'd at least be making some money and I could volunteer on the weekends. This plan just means that I can live and travel abroad without undertaking a two year commitment and I can still be a mom in (late) 2008. Just my thoughts of the day...

What else? Oh, well I was hoping to get to open studio and Ikea today right after work but my painter called and said he was available to come and work on the cabinets so those plans changed. He should be done after the next visit. I hope they are done by Thanksgiving and the smell goes away cause I will be eating right here in my own house. I decided not to fly out to LA with the rest of my family. This will be my first Thanksgiving without my family but there may be some other folks around to come over. We'll see. If not, I can continue being productive!!

So I was home all afternoon so here is what I did. Let me add that having to post daily means that I read other blogs daily and inevitably spend hours on the computer!! not good :(
Anyhoo~ this is what I was able to accomplish...

1. I'm in some sort of weird cooking phase cause I really don't enjoy cooking but today I made some coconut curry chicken and barbecued chicken. OK, I got some help. The coconut curry sauce was from Whole Foods but I had to doctor it up cause it was surprisingly bland. The bbq chicken I made in my new Crock Pot. I am so excited to simply throw some meat and veggies in there before work and come home to a hot, home cooked meal! I decided to try it out tonight. I put the chicken and store bought sauce (that also needed doctoring up) in there this afternoon. That was the only recipe I could make without going to the store for more ingredients!

2. Cleaned my stove.
~15 min.

3. Cleaned (part of) my bathroom. I need to get the bathroom shelves from Ikea this week. (Didn't feel like doing the tub).
~ 15 min.

Uh oh... I'm 30 min. short. It's only 8:30 but who am I kidding? I'll probably just watch some TV and chill. And eat my McDonald's sundae that's in my freezer. :( I should go to the gym! That's what motivated people who are committed to their health would do, huh? Or I could clean the tub.... not. I'm too tired lazy. Maybe tomorrow. ;-)

*** Update~ I made up the 30 minutes by researching fabrics on line. I am going to recover my dining room chairs and need to find something that will tie in better with the decor. Oh, and I tasted my bbq chicken. Yum! I am so into Crock Pot cooking! So easy! ***



Hope you had a productive day. See you tomorrow.

Nov. 18

Wanna help me make a decision? (LOL) ---------------------- >


I was up from 1:30 am to 4:30 am... and was tired most of the day as a result. But, I did a couple of things...

1. I attempted to make collard greens. I had to stop cooking them cause I had a date so I haven't tried the end result. I didn't have a recipe so I don't know if they will be good or not.

2. Laundry. Why is there always so much?!

3. Researched more overseas schools. I have chosen which specific school I want in each of the cities I have chosen. Now if I want to go abroad and don't get any offers from any of them, I'm not sure what I will do!




Hope you had a productive day. See you tomorrow.

Nov. 17

Wanna help me make a decision? --------------------------------------------------------->
(lol!)



I woke up at 7:30 and really wanted to turn over and back to sleep but the painters were supposed to be arriving at 8 so I got up, showered and put last night's dinner dishes in the dishwasher. Well, my painter called at 8:30 to cancel. He didn't offer an explanation other than to say he has "a problem". He's usually very reliable so I hope it's nothing too serious. Since he was supposed to be here all day I had the entire day free!

My handyman came over to do some things around the house. Also, my friend JW came over to discuss the things I want built. He is so handy. I saw a Murphy's bed and a custom closet he built by hand. He's very detailed-oriented so I know he will do a good job building what I need. We went through each room to discuss what I want. I am looking forward to having some bookcases, cabinets and shelves built to help store some of my stuff. I have so much stuff!!
~1 hour

Laundry.
~1 hour

By the time I got to open studio they were about to close but it was just enough time to put a base on a bowl I made.
~15 minutes

I went to my school cause they had a Thanksgiving potluck and an opportunity to pack donated food for a local soup kitchen.
~30 minutes


Hope you had a productive day. See you tomorrow.

Nov. 16

Wanna help me make a decision?!?!?!?!?!?? ------------------------------------------->
(lol!)



I love Fridays! I was driving home from work today looking forward to a weekend full of being productive. And the drive is so beautiful. I think commuting over 30 minutes is a reason to move or not take a job. My commute is about 25 minutes (borderline... maybe I'm just looking for another excuse to leave!?) but in the fall it is actually enjoyable because the leaves are so amazingly brilliant and beautiful. Fall on the East Coast. I missed this so much when I lived in Cali. Check out what I see when I drive to work every day.

Beautiful!!

Let's see... what did I do today?

1. Went to the gym and picked up a schedule of classes. I need to start going!!! When I first started productivity month I thought I should challenge myself to work out every day but then I decided not to set myself up for failure. I haven't worked out once yet in November! Pitiful :(
~ 15 minutes

2. Went to Home Depot Expo Design Center. Got estimates for plantation shutters and wood blinds. They are so much more reasonable than Next Day Blinds but since they don't specialize in blinds they weren't able to answer all of my questions. I am leaning towards plantation shutters in the living room, dining room and master bedroom and these cool cordless wood blinds for the rest of the house. Still a grip of cash. Why are they so darn expensive? Doesn't make sense! It's no wonder I still have up the $5 paper blinds from Home Depot I hung last summer. But I have decided I am going to get what I want and not worry about it. I also looked at carpeting but after being in the window treatments department for two hours I couldn't handle the stress. I was tired and hungry.
~2 hours

I need to go back there on Sunday and price stone flooring for the bathroom, kitchen counter tops and carpeting. Tomorrow the painters are coming to finish up the kitchen cabinets and my handyman is coming to do some other things around the house.


Hope you had a productive day. See you tomorrow.

Nov. 15

I got an email from Natalie at Gladney about the how it would work if I started the adoption process here and finished it in Ethiopia or the reverse. Basically she said it could be done but it would be "expensive". Hmmm... adoption starting and ending here is expensive. I guess that means it's more expensive. That's hard to imagine! She basically recommended starting and finishing the adoption here in the US and remaining here the following year for all the post-placement visits. Well, I honestly can't imagine paying more for this adoption than is already required so without even knowing how much that is I guess it means I either adopt now and put living abroad on hold OR go abroad and put off adopting. Either way I'd have to wait 2-3 years. That's a long time to be a mom and a long time to wait to live and travel abroad. The only way I can satisfy both would be to quit my job in December and go abroad in the spring. I wonder if I could pull that off...? (Not likely).
Maybe I'll win the lottery. (Also not likely).

Worked more on art ideas.
~30 minutes

Went to Next Day Blinds to price plantation shutters and wood blinds. Their prices are no joke. I decided I really want plantation shutters but I need to shop around. There has got to be somewhere I can buy them more cheaply. I'll look at Home Depot and Home Depot Expo this weekend.
~ 1 hour

Pottery class
~2.5 hours

Hope you had a productive day. See you tomorrow.

Nov. 14

OK, I was not productive for an hour today. I was at work so late and when I got home I just wanted to relax. I have time to make up again. :-/


Worked on my ideas for my art business. (more on that later)
~ 30 min.

Hope you had a productive day. See you tomorrow.

Nov. 13

The smell of paint is making me nauseous. The painters came today to start on the kitchen cabinets. I meant to photograph the kitchen before they started but forgot so this is the only picture I have of before. This was taken with my old co-worker, Melissa, the first week I moved in. You can kind of see what they looked like before. The picture makes them look like a beautiful cherry. They aren't. They are ugly oak.


This is what I see downstairs right now. Yikes! Hope I made the right decision!!





~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Three year olds are so great. Can I just tell you how much I love being with them? (Although I said that about my second graders as well when I used to teach them. I guess I just really enjoy spending time with kids.) Today in the gym two little girls got hurt. Ella (in my class) fell off the scooter and split her chin and Sophia (in another class) got hit on the head with a ball. I took Ella to get some ice and then to get some antiseptic and a band aid. As I squirted some of the ointment out onto a QTip she looked at me with watery eyes and asked, "Is it going to hurt?" I told her "No, I promise." I was completely amazed when she didn't flinch when I applied it to her chin, completely trusting me. That really made me feel good to know that in three months she is bonded enough to me to trust my words. The other little girl, Sophia isn't in my class but her class joins mine on the playground. She sees me every day and she's a talker so I talk to her about 3 min. a day. (She's half Portuguese and has the cutest accent so I love to engage her in conversation). Anyway, she got hit in the head with a basketball and started to cry. Her teacher intervened and had the girl who threw the ball apologize and then told her she was fine and to go play. Well, she wasn't satisfied. She was still rubbing her head and looked over at me. I called her to me and she came right over. I saw she still had tears streaming down her face so I asked her if she wanted me to check it. She nodded and sat down in my lap. I asked her what happened and then took some time to examine her head. Three year olds just really want their feelings to be validated, I find. When I told her it wasn't bleeding and it was OK, she stopped crying, gave me a hug and was able to go back to playing. I saw her classroom teacher glance over at me with a surprised look on her face. I was kind of surprised myself, that she would come to me to comfort her over her own classroom teacher. As I was leaving the gym I passed another teacher with her kindergarten class on the steps. She said, "I don't know how you do it." I said, "Oh, they are so cute. They grow on you, trust me." She responded with "There's no way." To which I said, "Well, maybe they fulfill my maternal instinct." She said, "Well, forget these kids and go on and do that adoption or have one of your own!" I was thinking about that as I walked up the steps to my classroom. I wonder if I am dragging my feet because I am with children every day, and have been for 15 years. I bet if I didn't get to see kids every day I would be so much more pressed. Probably, but my time is coming. I look forward to nurturing and loving my own little one one day.



But meanwhile, my co-workers are still nuts so I looked on line for a new job.
~ 1 hour

Cleaned.
~1 hour.

Hope you had a productive day. See you tomorrow.

Nov. 12

1. Organized thousands of CDs. Not really that many but it sure felt like it when I realized most of them weren't in their correct cases. Won't be doing that anymore! They were spread out on the table and now they are in a nice, neat stack.
~ 1 hour


maybe i should get an ipod

2. Pulled all these books off the shelves, wiped it down and put them back in an organized fashion.
~ 2 hours!!!



3. Prayed about the November IUI. A friend of mine told me if I pray and don't hear an answer that means that it's not the right time. I am totally conflicted. I do want to try to have a baby, but I am still grappling with the whole donor sperm thing. Maybe I'll be ready in December.
~20 min.

4. Spoke to Natalie at Gladney. I have been noticing that the referral times appear to be getting longer. I remember this summer that the whole process start to finish was taking 8-9 months, with only 2-3 for a referral. She said it has gotten longer. Now the referral process for an infant (boy or girl) is taking 3-5 months. Also the court date takes another 1-2 months and another month for the travel date. That adds quite a bit of time! I'm not sure what that all adds up to now but it looks like start to finish it'll be 12- 15 months now instead of 9. I'm not sure how that affects my decision, but it's worth noting. Then I told her about the possibility that I would be moving abroad. I asked her to find out what the process is if I...

a. start here and finish while living abroad

b. start and finish while living abroad or

c. start while living abroad and finish here.

I know-- COM-PLI-CA-TED! (i'm a nightmare) Of course she said she had to get back to me.
~ 20 min.

And finally, I hired the painter (again!) to come tomorrow to paint the kitchen cabinets. They are basically new; the previous owner renovated the kitchen, but not my taste. Not a fan of oak. I decided to paint first (cheaper route) and if I hate them then I'll look into refacing them or totally replacing them (expensive!!) Stay tuned for the new look.


Hope you had a productive day. See you tomorrow.

Nov. 11

1. Read excerpts from Race Against Time by Stephen Lewis. More on this book later.
~1 hour

2. Met with my handyman to discuss what I need done around the house.
~15 min.

3. Moved furniture. My house will be done by December. (my mantra)
~ 1 hour


Hope you had a productive day. See you tomorrow.

Nov. 10

Finally a really productive day. I did 2 loads of laundry, waxed the hardwood floors on the second floor and cleaned out the room which is going to be an upstairs den. Tomorrow my handyman is coming to do some more things around the house. I also called the painter and asked him for an estimate to paint my kitchen cabinets and the master bedroom. I will get this house together before 2008! I also wrote out a guest list and planned the menu for my holiday open house (a great way to motivate me to get things done!!).

~ 5 hours

Below is a nice poem I found on another blog.

Legacy Of An Adopted Child

One you do not remember, the other you call Mother.

Two different lives shaped to make you one.

One became your guiding star, the other became your sun.

The first one gave you life, and the second taught you to live it.

The first gave you a need for love. The second was there to give it.

One gave you a nationality. The other gave you a name.

One gave you a talent. The other gave you aim.

One gave you emotions. The other calmed your fears.

One saw your first sweet smile. The other dried your tears.

One sought for you a home that she could not provide.

The other prayed for a child and her hope was not denied.

And now you ask me, through your tears, the age-old question unanswered through the years.

Heredity or environment, which are you a product of?

Neither, my darling. Neither.

Just two different kinds of Love.

© Author Unknown

Hope you had a productive day. See you tomorrow.

Nov. 9

I am so-o-o-o-o-o-o glad the weekend is here, I can't even tell you! It has been a crazy week at work!! My co-workers are a TRIP!! I don't know how long I can work in an environment where people are disrespectful, whiny, rude, immature and deceitful! So, to that end, I have decided I really need to keep my eyes open about other opportunities. This afternoon I went to speak to a friend of mine who has a job that interests me. We strategized about how best to get an interview for a position I saw listed.

~ 2 hours

Hope you had a productive day. See you tomorrow.

Nov. 8

Went to the first session of my second pottery class. I chose a different instructor this time to try to learn some new techniques. I threw 2 bowls and a mug on the wheel! I don't know if it's cause I switched to white clay and it was easier to work with or if the instructor was better or if I just am getting better but I was so excited to see my progress! Here are some pictures of the pieces I made in my first class.












~ 2.5 hours
(which means I made up for the time I owed from yesterday! woo-hoo!)


Hope you had a productive day. See you tomorrow.

Nov. 7

I am starting to think that these posts aren't interesting for anyone other than myself! Maybe I should include something other than what productive things I did during the day...? Maybe tomorrow! OK, I am at a 40 minute deficit... the pressure.

1. Registered for a new pottery class. I just finished intro to pottery last week and I loved it! Something about smooshing your hands into the earth is relaxing. I registered for another class cause nothing I made was more than 4" high. Building big things is hard! Especially if you want them symmetrical! I haven't mastered that yet. And I suck on the wheel. I need s-o-o-o much more practice but I love every minute of it. I can't wait to get there tomorrow to see some of my finished products. I glazed some pieces but nothing I glazed had gotten fired last week. Can't wait to go in and see my handiwork. I will post pics of them tomorrow (if I'm not too embarrassed!) LOL
~ 10 minutes

2. Downloaded the forms from the sperm bank website to request donor photos. I don't know why it is so difficult and requires a legal document. I thought I could click on a photo, pay the fee thru paypal and print them out. Not so easy. You have to download the form which is actually a consent agreement. Then agree to release the bank and the donor of all expense and obligation concerning future child, not publicize or publish the photo, not seek any form or payment from the donor, etc, etc, etc. That all makes sense when getting sperm, but, dang for a photo?! And I have to sign it in front of a witness! And the photos aren't cheap. I think sperm banks are a racket anyways, though. They pay the man a small fee for a "specimen", then divide it up into 7 vials and charge a ridiculous fee for each vial. They are clearly taking advantage of people, but, hey it's a business and I am glad it's an option for people out there.
~10 minutes


Wow. Was I really only productive for 20 minutes today?! How is that possible and it's already 9:00 at night. This isn't good. What have I been doing all night? Hmmm... I made a grilled cheese sandwich, then I lit some candles, put on some music and talked on the phone for hours. Bad, bad, bad!!! And now I am tired. And I have a good excuse to go to bed~ I have parent teacher conferences tomorrow. Eight of them at 45 minutes each. That's a lot of talking. And I am still dealing with this cold, though it appears to be going away finally. So I am going to go to bed. That's another 40 minutes to add on. Yikes! Which makes the additional total an hour and 20 minutes! Glad the weekend is coming so I can make up all the time.

Hope you had a productive day. See you tomorrow.

Nov. 6

1. Decided to add Tanzania to the list of international schools I would consider taking a job if hired. If I don't move abroad I will just have to take an extended trip-back to Senegal, then to Tanzania and Ethiopia and finish in Hong Kong!
~ 15 min.

2. Sent an email to a friend about a job I may apply for cause she works in that field now. I would like to either make more money or work in a school with a 10 month schedule (one of the benefits of teaching, hello!!) Where I work now is an 11 month schedule.
~ 5 min.

Then I went to take a nap and slept for 3 hours and was basically a zombie the rest of the night. Hopefully the TheraFlu will help cause this cold is messin' with my productivity!!! I will make up the 40 minutes!!


Hope you had a productive day. See you tomorrow.

Nov. 5

This dumb cold is hanging on and dragging me down!
Yet, I was still productive. :)

1. laundry
~ 15 min.

2. cleaned out the refrigerator and freezer
~ 30 min.


blog entries without photos are boring. heehee :)


3. measured my windows to get an estimate for blinds
~ 5 min.

4. ignored my negative friend PIERRE (told you i was going to call you out on my blog!!!!) who told me that "having a child is a 24-hour a day job, Laura" and "you will severely hamper your chances of ever meeting someone if you become a mom, Laura". WHY does he feel the need to say things like this?! is he trying to dissuade me? well, it won't work, PIERRE!!! i KNOW it will be a 24-hour a day job. i got it. and so.. what? don't do it? (but this is coming from the same person who said i'd have a better chance of being in a terrorist attack than getting married after 40). sorry for the ranting, but i am sick and in no mood for negative comments!!! :-< ~ 10 annoying min. 5. spent time with my neighbor and her adorable 2 month old daughter. she lives 2 doors down and although we have only known each other for 4 months we are discovering we know many of the same people, have many similar interests and are facing some similar challenges. it's so nice to have a new friend with a new baby close by. ~ 120 minutes

Hope you had a productive day. See you tomorrow.

Nov. 4

Tough being productive today with a sore throat and being so tired but I did take some time to look at more donors. My sister was on her computer in LA while I was on mine here and we talked about some of my choices. She thought I should focus on the "doctorate" donors, those with advanced degrees (which the sperm bank charges more for!) I'm not as concerned about that as I am about him being an open donor and once you add that factor the choices are quite limited.
~ 30 minutes

Prayed about what direction my life should go.
~ 30 minutes

Hope you had a productive day. See you tomorrow.

Nov. 3

I went to pottery to glaze my last pieces. ~60 minutes +
Could have done more but my throat was killing me and I had to come home and lie down.


Hope you had a productive day. See you tomorrow.

Nov. 2

Narrowed down my choice of international cities to the top 3
(in no particular order)

Addis Ababa, Hong Kong, and Dakar.

1. Why Addis? My future child is from there and can spend time in her country, learn Amharic, it's warm, I can volunteer in an orphanage or get involved with the community in other ways, it's Africa, and there are some good looking men there (girl's got to have a social life!)

2. Why Hong Kong? It pays well, I know someone there and another friend of mine may end up in the same school, if I can learn Chinese (yeah, right!) I will have a super- marketable skill when I return, I've never been to Asia, lots of bankers, state of the art campus, safe city and it's warm.

3. Why Dakar? I was in Senegal last spring so I am familiar with the city, a good friend of mine teaches at the international school there, I met other folks who live there, it's warm and has a beach, I can learn French, great music scene.

I will have to look closely at all the benefits if I actually get hired and one may outweigh another. My neighbor has actually lived in Addis Ababa and Hong Kong (imagine that!) and came over to share her own insight about each city-pros and cons.
~60 minutes

Below are some photos from my trip to Dakar last spring.


getting my hair braided


yassa poulet (yum!!)



at accro baobab (obstacle course)



shopping/bargaining



on the way to goree´island



at the international school


at the beach


Hope everyone had a productive day. See you tomorrow.