What Would You Do?

Before I left for Addis I was very stressed about some things going on in my life. I have mentioned some of those on this blog but there were other reasons, too. Let's just say I had enough for me to request a full on stress test and EKG before I got on the plane. My regular doctor is actually a cardiologist so he ordered up all the tests. For the most part they came back normal-- except for one area which I can't articulate with any knowledge so I won't even try. Basically, what was important was he cleared me for travel and told me not to worry. So I didn't.

These past three weeks my stress level has increased considerably. I am happier and I laugh more than I have in a long, long time and have my little pumpkin to thank for that. I am also more active--not nearly to the level that I should be, but it's a start. The reality is though that all the things that were stressing me out before are still there --plus the added stress of parenting--but now I have less time and energy to devote to solving them. I also don't have time to think about what's not getting done so I don't seem to be upset about it on a daily basis like I was before but apparently my body knows. I had a doctor's appointment scheduled for today mainly because he wanted to meet my daughter. I went not expecting to have anything done but they did the normal basic things like height, weight, drew blood for some tests and took my blood pressure. Two surprising things were discovered:

1. I have lost eight pounds and
2. My blood pressure has gone up TWENTY points

I knew I lost weight in Addis but I have lost even more since being home. But the blood pressure?! Scary stuff! The nurse did it once and then he repeated it twice. On his last try it only showed a spike of ten points but I am going with twenty (though even ten points in a month would be huge). To put it mildly, I am horrified. Hypertension is common in my family but my blood pressure has always been low. We even spoke of this in my last appointment. He said I should expect it to increase in the next decade since most people in my family have it. I wasn't expecting it to be high one month later. I basically went from having low blood pressure to having high blood pressure in a month! High. Not something to watch because it's approaching a high number, but it is already high.

All three of us were shocked. The nurse muttered something about it under her breath but said the doctor would repeat it. He repeated it and was shocked. He suggested I make an appointment in two weeks to see if it's still high. I am supposed to be going back to work in two weeks. In fact, the day they tried to give me an appointment was supposed to be my first day back (and my baby shower). I told them I couldn't make it on that day. But now I am having enormous second thoughts. Of course Google doesn't help, but it is very scary to read symptoms you have online. Clearly I need to take immediate action. I am going to call them tomorrow and see if I can still get that April 6th appointment. I am also going to start exercising immediately.Right before the appointment I picked up the part needed to add to my recalled McClaren stroller to make it safe. I am going to install it tomorrow and start taking long walks each day. And, damn, I guess I need to give up all that delicious coffee I bought in Addis.

This is interesting: he also said he could write a note to my job saying he needed to monitor me over the next six+ weeks and that I should not return to work during that time. When I rejected the April 6th appointment I suppose in my head I was planning on returning to work on time but as I type this post I am thinking maybe I need to stay home. My little girl needs me to be in top physical condition. I'm all she has so my health needs to be my #1 priority. I guess I wasn't sure if staying home would help to reduce my stress but at least I won't be worrying about her. Truthfully, I think she will love day care. She seems so happy when around other kids but I worry a lot about our attachment. She is becoming more attached but it's not where I would like it to be and I wonder how not seeing me for ten hours a day will affect it? That gives me a lot of stress and daily worry. If I stayed home, that one worry would be eliminated. I could also be sure to exercise daily (once she is attached I can resume going to the gym and drop her in the gym daycare). I'm so conflicted about what to do. One possible plus is I might be able to get paid since I would now be staying home for medical reasons. But perhaps going back to work will make things more normal again? If you were me would you take the note and stay home?