dating woes...

I had a first date awhile back. This man has three children so it took him some serious convincing to get me to go out with him in the first place. I finally agreed when he said something like, 'You expect me to accept your daughter but you won't accept my children?' OK, guilt. Yes, I'll go out with you.

We went to a great restaurant. And we had a decent time. He was entertaining, generous, engaging. It was fun. I thanked him. He hugged me good-bye. Did I think he was the one? No. Would I have gone out with him again? Sure. At my age you keep your options open. He called me during the week expressing how much he was into me and how excited he was to have met me, etc., etc. He scheduled a date one week from our first date, the following Saturday night. We briefly talked the night before and he said he would call the next day to confirm. He did not. I ended up texting him asking him if we were going to meet in the same spot. I never heard from him.

Fast forward two weeks. Phone rings.

I had long ago erased his number so I picked up not knowing who was on the other end.

Hello?

Hey, it's J.

Oh, J. Hi.

So, how are you?

Um, fine...

What's wrong?

Do you not remember planning a date weeks ago and standing me up?

I didn't stand you up.

You did. You asked me out for Saturday night and never called to confirm.

Oh, yeah, well my phone died and I had no way of getting in touch with you.

Your phone died?

Yeah, I dropped it and it broke into a million smithereens.

I see.

I don't know if you remember but I have a Treo.

No, I didn't notice.

Remember? I'm sure I pulled it out when we were on the date. Well, anyway, I don't know if you know how they work, but you can download your address book from them onto the computer, but mine was new so I hadn't done that yet so I lost your contact information.

I see... then how were you able to contact me just now?

Oh, um, I got my phone bill and recognized your number from there. I saw it awhile back actually but I have been getting work done on my deck so I guess my priorities weren't in order. I was just so caught up with contractors.. You know how that goes.

I see. So, you were so busy with your contractors that even though you have had my information for awhile, you didn't think it was important enough to take 5 minutes out of your day to call me?

Well, yeah. It's been crazy around here. But I want to call and apologize cause I am really not like this.

(um, you actually are exactly like that but whatever) Ok.

But the good news is, my deck is done!

Great. I''m happy for you. (major sarcasm)

Well, you have my number now so give me a call sometime!

Listen, J. To be honest with you, I don't see that happening. I wasn't enough of a priority to you for you to call and apologize as soon as you were able so I really don't see myself calling you.

OK, then. Well, there's nothing I can do then.... Can I give you some advice before I go?

(No, not really) Yeah?

It wouldn't kill you to make a call every once in awhile and show your appreciation. You could show some gratitude and make a man feel like he's appreciated. I mean, I'm not suggesting you hop into bed with someone on the first date or anything, but seriously, if you are trying to make something happen in your life you need to step it up. Cause let me tell you, your competition out here is FIERCE. It is so incredibly fierce you have NO idea! I mean, you're nice and all but you need to step things up if you ever expect anything to happen for you.


Alrighty then. Where are all the decent men?